The Magic of a Personal Retreat

"We hear voices in solitude we never hear in the hurry and turmoil of life; we receive counsels and comforts we get under no other condition." --Amelia Barr

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/pixhook

My goal for today is to inspire you to take a personal retreat!  Your first objection might be that you can't take the time for a retreat.  When I go for 4 nights, I come back with ideas that actually save me time in the long run. Really!

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There's no one right way to do this, but I'll show you how I conduct my own personal retreats.  As you read, notice the things that would work best for you...and the parts of my retreats that don't appeal to you.

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Imagine this as a virtual tour of what a personal retreat can be.  Then jot down  what you'd love to include in your retreat plans, and imagine a virtual tour of your ideal retreat experience!

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I've been very fortunate to find a retreat center in Reading, PA, that has very reasonable rates and is just 30 minutes from my home.  If you live in the Mid-Atlantic States here in the US, you're welcome to email me for more details about this particular center at scleaver@dejazzd.com.

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I began a ritual of going on retreats regularly back in September, 2011, when one of my health care professionals warned me that I was headed for burn-out if something didn't change soon.

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I had been under prolonged stress due to a family crisis, and it was wearing down my physical and emotional health.  (You don't have to wait for a crisis...regular retreats now will help you deal with obstacles and ups and downs that may confront you later.)

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O.K., on to the juicy stuff!

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photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Tina Lorien

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My intuition waits patiently for me to reach a relaxed and quiet state, even if it takes days.  Then I find ideas and solutions raining down onto the pages of my journal! 

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photo (c) iStockphoto.com/4FR

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 When I go on a personal retreat, I don't take "input" materials with me, such as books for example.  Here's what I do take, along with my clothes, toothbrush, etc.:

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~my camera

~items to make a small altar in my room

~my sketch pad and pencils

~sea salt and a basin for relaxing foot soaks

~my journal and pens

~snacks

~three beautiful scarves to decorate my room

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And that is it!  I don't take anything else to read, listen to, or do.  It's very important that I make my environment different from home.

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I love my home, but if I brought along the things I usually get input from at home, my habits of thought would stay almost the same, and I'd lose much of the benefit of the retreat.  My mind would be too full and noisy to hear the nuggets of wisdom being revealed to me! 

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"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase." --Martin Luther King, Jr.

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 The grounds around the retreat house are also very conducive to contemplation and relaxation.  Each room has a large window with a comfy chair strategically placed for enjoying the view.

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I get just enough socialization at mealtimes and from exchanging a few words with the others I may pass in the hall or outside.

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So, that sums up what works best for me during a personal retreat.

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photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Igor Demchenkov

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But everyone is different, of course.  Please click "Comments" below and let my other readers and me know what has worked for you. 


If you haven't tried a personal retreat yet, please comment on what you imagine would work for you.  That will help you to gain clarity and motivation, and it will inspire the rest of us!

"Awareness, in and of itself, is curative."  --Robert Marrone

Thanks, 

Susan

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are (c) Susan Cleaver.***

***Member of TriCounty Community Network at www.tcnetwork.org***

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/CGinspiration

LOCAL EVENTS

Healthy Lifestyles EXPO, April 20, 2012, 9:30 to 1:30, in Pottstown, PA

Call 610-326-9563 to learn more!

  

 World Labyrinth Day: Walk as One, at 1:00 ~ May 5, 2012

  Sally Martin, Facilitator ~ Pottstown, PA 

 email Susan at scleaver@dejazzd.com for details.

SPECIAL OFFERS ~ GLOBAL

I'm currently offering special pricing of 25% off all my services, including coaching by phone.  This pricing is subject to change after June 30, 2012.

Also, I'm currently waiving the fee on all initial exploratory sessions!  This gives both of us the opportunity to test-drive a possible coaching partnership with no further obligation.  This complementary session offer is subject to change after September 21, 2012.  To set up an appointment, email me at  scleaver@dejazzd.com.

A WORD TO THE WISE

"Dr. Amen's ANT's" has been on my top-ten most popular post list for quite a while.  Check it out by going to November 17, 2008, in the archives. 

You may be familiar with some of Dr. Amen's work. He has about four books published.  He's been on a few PBS special programs in his role as an expert on the relationship between the brain and behavior.

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Befriending a Better Habit

Energy-Draining Bad Habits
The results of a bad or outgrown habit are like a swarm of gnats...distracting and annoying! The energy it takes to shoo them repeatedly away adds up over time and raises our stress levels. Yet like gnats, bad habits can be very persistent, as we all know!

I'll use one of mine as an example. I was a life-long producer of clutter who was also great at maintaining it! Ugh! In the past several months, I've finally gotten a handle on it. It's a lifestyle change that I have adopted, and I'm keeping a structure in place to assure that the new habit sticks.

Speaking of Structure...
...create some for yourself. Set up some way to be accountable to others for the changes you want to make. Choose your accountability partners carefully, because you will need gentle support and encouragement from them as well.

I continue to receive support and accountability from my family, friends, and coaching colleagues. Last fall I even went public here on my blog with a decluttering challenge that I had set for myself!

Make It Fun!
I know...this is where you're thinking, "This woman is nuts!" But give it a try. You might pair the new activities required with something you enjoy, such as listening to music.

Make yourself a chart so you can visually track your progress. Use colors and symbols that make you smile.

For my clutter-zapping and prevention, I set a goal of 15 minutes a day in four areas for a total of 1 hour a day. This keeps me on track, and the rewards of not having to deal with clutter or cleaning much during the rest of the time are well worth it.

And I do track my time on paper. If I'm out of town for the day, I make up the time later.

The Key to Motivation
O.K., even if you don't think you can find any way to make a new habit fun, ask yourself this: "How will this new habit support my larger vision?" This question could make a crucial difference to someone who, for example, is setting out to change from a procrastinator to someone who is proactive about getting things done.

When I saw decluttering as something I "should" do, I couldn't muster up the resolve to see it through. As my friend Sally says, "Don't should on yourself!"

Now, I see life much more holistically, and I know that staying organized affects the Feng Shui of my office and home, as well as my personal energy. I also see organization as an important element of my self-care. And it's important to me to be a great role model for clients, participants, and readers.

Some coaches don't discuss topics they are still struggling with because it makes them feel out of integrity. My feeling is, however, that if someone else can learn from something I know but have not yet been able to fully implement, why not share it with them? To stay in integrity, I just admit right up front that I'm still working on the issue myself.

These days, with the clutter issue, I can honestly say that I have a handle on it. There are a few drawers and closets that still need some work, but now that my new habit is in place, they too will soon be more orderly!

Best of Luck as You Develop New Habits that Will Serve You Better for a Lifetime! Please share your successes, setbacks, and questions with my other readers and me.

Thanks,
Susan

P.S. Shameless Plug: Contact me to set up a complimentary trial coaching session by phone or in person at scleaver@dejazzd.com or 610-385-3766!

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

***Member of TriCounty Community Network, a local human services resource at www.TCNetwork.info.

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Values, Vision, and Vitality Equal Results

Here's one way I propose to look at the manifesting process, using a nautical analogy....

Values
The value that guides your vision will serve as a beacon throughout the process of manifesting that vision. For an example, let's use "helping others to help themselves" as the value. And let's say that where you are now is the shore you're currently on concerning making something happen that will align with that value.

This value gives us the compelling purpose and motivation for developing the vision.


Vision
The vision is the vehicle that will get you to the far shore, which is the manifestation of the vision. An example of a vision guided by the value above might be starting a non-profit organization that extends loans to micro-businesses in third-world countries.

Keeping the vision aligned with the value contributes to the integrity of the project. It also inspires others with the same value to support the vision.

Through the vision, you can articulate your desired results in a way that others can understand, imagine, and get behind. In computer terms, it's like putting your idea and desire into a PDF so everyone can see it easily. Next, we can partner the vision with vitality to assure the feasibility of the project.


Vitality
What resources will it take to make the project work? Vitality is the bridge for the vision to cross. This bridge must be engineered with a firm foundation consisting of self-care, financial responsibility, leadership, patience, trust, flexibility, and sustainable energy.

This foundation will help you maintain your passion and enthusiasm, and it will help you align with the Law of Attraction. Vitality will also contribute to the integrity of the project by allowing you to actually move on it, and not just daydream about it.

In the case of our example above, vitality will assure that the organization can be founded, funds can be secured and managed, and enthusiasm can be sustained.

What? You don't see yourself as a visionary? Let your values give birth to your image, and let vitality carry it to fruition!

I'd love to hear about your experiences with this model!

Thanks,
Susan

P.S. to "locals": Details will be available soon about the largest-yet 4th Annual Boyertown Wellness Council Health Fair! It'll take place on Saturday, March 21, 2009, from 10:00 am to 1:00 pm at the Boyertown Area Sr. High School.

I'll be facilitating a brief workshop on "Embracing Imperfection," demonstrating Reiki on willing participants, and hosting an exhibit table about coaching and Reiki. Order forms will be available for a special discount on my products. I hope to see you there!

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

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What's Holding You Back?

Check out these creativity squashers and their corresponding remedies:

Creativity Squashers-----------------Creativity Accelerators

"Yeah, but...."--------------------------"What if...."

"It hasn't been done before...."-------"Then I'll have to be first!"

"It's all been done before."-----------------"I'll find a new twist!"

Motivation from outside you.--------------Motivation from inside.

Too much or too little structure.-----------Just enough structure to-----------------------------------------------------hang your thoughts on.

Depression.-------------------------------Strong emotional health.

Anger or resentment.---------------------Forgiveness and letting go.

Fear.-------------------------------------Do it anyway.

Trying to please everyone.------------Being authentic.

Hidden pay-offs for staying stuck.-----Expose them and weigh them------------------------------------------------against the pay-offs-----------------------------------------------------------for letting yourself be creative.

Burn-out.--------------------------------Self-care.

Ignore your intuition.-------------------Invite your intuition.

Standard outlining.---------------------Tony Buzan's Mind Maps (R).

Perfectionism.--------------------------Self-acceptance.

Striving.---------------------------------Playfulness.

Having something to prove.-----------Having something to discover.


So go out and discover! What if...?

Please keep my other readers and me posted on your progress!

Be well,
Susan

P.S. To those in the greater Philadelphia, PA, area:

On Saturday, April 12, I'll be exhibiting and offering free Reiki samples at the Boyertown Community Health and Wellness Fair from 10:00 am to 1:00 pm. The fair will be held at the Boyertown Area Sr. High School, 120 Monroe Street. And there is no charge to attend! Stop by my table to chat, pick up some info on "stressing less," and try some Reiki!

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

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Getting Serious About Humor

It's 2008. Do You Know Where Your Sense of Humor Is?

Actress Cheryl Ladd says you must keep your sense of humor, even when you think "it's two towns over, in a ditch." Einstein explains why: "You can't solve a problem with the same level of mind that created it."

It's true, humor can change your brain chemically (by causing endorphins to be produced) and physically (by creating new connections of neurons). Humor can get you out of a thinking rut, often in a relatively short period of time.

''Good-humored" humor (without malice) contributes to our well-being holistically, with benefits in these areas and probably more:

Creativity

Have you heard the expression, "Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly"? Humor raises our vibration to make it easier to gain intuitive input. Creativity is also enhanced by new connections among the neurons in the brain.

Learning

Learning is more effective and long-lasting if it's presented in a humorous way.

Motivation and Morale

Humor helps us to draw on our intrinsic motivation. It helps pull us toward what we want to accomplish. Motivation from an outside source, such as a demanding boss, pushes us forward. Feeling pushed can cause the quality of our work to decline, and morale will suffer.

Relationships

Because humor raises our vibration, we are more likely to be drawn to others who have raised their vibrations, too, and you will find the quality of your relationships improving.

Health

All areas of your health can be improved by humor: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Laughter has been likened to an internal massage! Humor helps to dispel negative, lower energies, and replace them with lighter, more positive ones, which over time can enhance healing.

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Life Is Messy

Being able to laugh at yourself is very important. We make mistakes. There are things about ourselves we wish we could change.

Take a tip from Abraham Lincoln. His life was riddled with personal and public defeats. And his physical appearance was somewhat awkward and homely.

One day as Lincoln was speaking in public, someone called him "two-faced." Lincoln probably knew that this person's mind was made up, so instead of trying to reason with him, he chose humor for his response. Lincoln said, "Sir, if I had two faces, do you think I'd be wearing this one??"

Out of the Mouths of Babes

Humor and creativity come very naturally to children, and it's a great way to communicate with them. Maybe some of that amazing humor and creativity that we were schooled out of will be rejuvenated!

So, when we think we're too busy for "fun and games," we need to reconsider our position. We often resist what we need the most!

The Conscious Mind Can't Go It Alone

We can shut down, hunker down, and try to create with the limited material in our conscious minds, but this is often a self-contained loop that gets us nowhere. Or we can lighten up, loosen up, and open up to the vast creative opportunities available to us when we allow the input of our unconscious mind and the collective unconscious.

Let Your Sense of Humor Bridge the Gap

Humor takes down the walls that are blocking your creativity and uses them for bridges!

Here's to a New Year filled with laughter and creativity,

Susan

P.S. 'Need any help getting the New Year off to a great start? See my Dec. 11 post on creative resolutions and/or email me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to set up a complimentary coaching tele-session!

**All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.**

It's Fall. Do You Know Where Your Creativity Is?

Seasonal Affective Disorder and the Creative Mind
Our thoughts and our biochemistry are so closely entwined, it's no wonder that SAD can leave you wondering if you have a creative bone left in your body! Maybe, like me, you sometimes feel that the bears have the right idea about coping with the darker seasons.

An inability to take in enough light through your eyes during shorter, grayer days can affect your biochemistry and make you feel like a wet noodle for months if you are susceptible. And while you may be able to slog through your day job, the muse is not fond of slogging and will likely leave you feeling about as creative as a kitchen sponge.

Symptoms Are Compounded by Misconceptions and Stigmas
Common symptoms of SAD include depression, irritability, carb cravings, fatigue, sleepiness, and a lack of motivation. Friends and family who aren't affected may wonder why you don't just "snap out of it." As if you wouldn't if you could!

And then there are the stigmas around behavioral health issues and asking for help. Ugh!

Help Is Available
There are lots of resources available today to help you deal with SAD:

• Self-help tips abound.
• Specially-designed light boxes are available.
• Professional help can be very valuable. Therapy and/or medication may be called for in some instances.

In addition to using these resources, I also have an accountability buddy. We provide gentle structure for each other by setting up several hours a week when we call each other to declare what we are going to work on and then what we have completed.

The encouragement and feeling of connection that we provide for each other is very helpful, too. It keeps up our motivation, and we feel good about our accomplishments, which leads to more motivation!

Your accountability buddy need not suffer from SAD to benefit from this arrangement. This idea has been used in the coaching community for years, often in groups on conference calls.

If you're interested in having such a buddy, email me at scleaver@dejazzd.com, and I will make every effort to match you up with someone. If there is sufficient interest in doing this in a group, I would be glad to host the call.

Coaching can also provide accountability, motivation, and encouragement. Feel free to email me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to set up a complimentary trial tele-session.

I'm not willing to let SAD rob me of a full, happy, and creative life. How about you?

To your fulfillment and good health,

Susan