The Magic of a Personal Retreat

"We hear voices in solitude we never hear in the hurry and turmoil of life; we receive counsels and comforts we get under no other condition." --Amelia Barr

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/pixhook

My goal for today is to inspire you to take a personal retreat!  Your first objection might be that you can't take the time for a retreat.  When I go for 4 nights, I come back with ideas that actually save me time in the long run. Really!

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There's no one right way to do this, but I'll show you how I conduct my own personal retreats.  As you read, notice the things that would work best for you...and the parts of my retreats that don't appeal to you.

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Imagine this as a virtual tour of what a personal retreat can be.  Then jot down  what you'd love to include in your retreat plans, and imagine a virtual tour of your ideal retreat experience!

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I've been very fortunate to find a retreat center in Reading, PA, that has very reasonable rates and is just 30 minutes from my home.  If you live in the Mid-Atlantic States here in the US, you're welcome to email me for more details about this particular center at scleaver@dejazzd.com.

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I began a ritual of going on retreats regularly back in September, 2011, when one of my health care professionals warned me that I was headed for burn-out if something didn't change soon.

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I had been under prolonged stress due to a family crisis, and it was wearing down my physical and emotional health.  (You don't have to wait for a crisis...regular retreats now will help you deal with obstacles and ups and downs that may confront you later.)

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O.K., on to the juicy stuff!

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photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Tina Lorien

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My intuition waits patiently for me to reach a relaxed and quiet state, even if it takes days.  Then I find ideas and solutions raining down onto the pages of my journal! 

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photo (c) iStockphoto.com/4FR

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 When I go on a personal retreat, I don't take "input" materials with me, such as books for example.  Here's what I do take, along with my clothes, toothbrush, etc.:

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~my camera

~items to make a small altar in my room

~my sketch pad and pencils

~sea salt and a basin for relaxing foot soaks

~my journal and pens

~snacks

~three beautiful scarves to decorate my room

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And that is it!  I don't take anything else to read, listen to, or do.  It's very important that I make my environment different from home.

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I love my home, but if I brought along the things I usually get input from at home, my habits of thought would stay almost the same, and I'd lose much of the benefit of the retreat.  My mind would be too full and noisy to hear the nuggets of wisdom being revealed to me! 

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"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase." --Martin Luther King, Jr.

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 The grounds around the retreat house are also very conducive to contemplation and relaxation.  Each room has a large window with a comfy chair strategically placed for enjoying the view.

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I get just enough socialization at mealtimes and from exchanging a few words with the others I may pass in the hall or outside.

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So, that sums up what works best for me during a personal retreat.

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photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Igor Demchenkov

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But everyone is different, of course.  Please click "Comments" below and let my other readers and me know what has worked for you. 


If you haven't tried a personal retreat yet, please comment on what you imagine would work for you.  That will help you to gain clarity and motivation, and it will inspire the rest of us!

"Awareness, in and of itself, is curative."  --Robert Marrone

Thanks, 

Susan

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are (c) Susan Cleaver.***

***Member of TriCounty Community Network at www.tcnetwork.org***

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/CGinspiration

LOCAL EVENTS

Healthy Lifestyles EXPO, April 20, 2012, 9:30 to 1:30, in Pottstown, PA

Call 610-326-9563 to learn more!

  

 World Labyrinth Day: Walk as One, at 1:00 ~ May 5, 2012

  Sally Martin, Facilitator ~ Pottstown, PA 

 email Susan at scleaver@dejazzd.com for details.

SPECIAL OFFERS ~ GLOBAL

I'm currently offering special pricing of 25% off all my services, including coaching by phone.  This pricing is subject to change after June 30, 2012.

Also, I'm currently waiving the fee on all initial exploratory sessions!  This gives both of us the opportunity to test-drive a possible coaching partnership with no further obligation.  This complementary session offer is subject to change after September 21, 2012.  To set up an appointment, email me at  scleaver@dejazzd.com.

A WORD TO THE WISE

"Dr. Amen's ANT's" has been on my top-ten most popular post list for quite a while.  Check it out by going to November 17, 2008, in the archives. 

You may be familiar with some of Dr. Amen's work. He has about four books published.  He's been on a few PBS special programs in his role as an expert on the relationship between the brain and behavior.

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Twelve Tips for Designing and Using Affirmations

Here we go....


1. Affirmations need to be clear and to the point, so make sure the goals that the affirmations are growing out of are crystal clear and specific.


2. Now that you have clarity around your goals, check to see that the goals are a good fit for you before designing affirmations around them.


3. Look at your goals again. Who do you need to be in order to reach that goal? If your goals require you to become more outgoing, that would be a good place to start developing affirmations. Examples might be: "I enjoy getting to know new people in my life," and "I have a lot of value to offer the people I'm meeting."


4. As you design your affirmations, keep in mind what you personally need to hear to make it easier to reach your goals. The affirmations that your friend is successfully using may not resonate for you at all.


5. Don't share your goals and affirmations with negative people as they are developing. Their remarks may stall your progress or halt it altogether. Protect these seeds of your future accomplishments.


6. Always create your affirmations in the present tense. Don't start with, "Someday I will...." Your subconscious mind will always see those in the future, so you'll find them difficult to manifest.


7. Always state your affirmations in the positive, such as, "I enjoy excellent health." Statements such as "I don't want to be sick," will keep your subconscious mind focusing on sickness.


8. Have a plan in place for when limiting beliefs pop up while you're doing your affirmations. Consciously reverse those old beliefs, which transforms them into affirmations, too!


9. Does your environment reflect your intentions? It's hard to convince yourself that, "I'm in control of every aspect of my business," when you look in your office and see disorganized piles of papers cluttering every surface in the room.


10. Do your actions reflect your intentions? Are you scouting out the new clothes you'll buy when you lose weight? Can you imagine how you'll look and feel in them? Do you know where you'll most enjoy wearing them? (Whatever you do, don't berate yourself for not fitting into them yet!)


11. Use a multi-sensory approach to introducing new affirmations to your subconscious mind. You can write them, read them, listen to a recording of them, and make art about them!


12. Have respect for workings of the Universe that we can't see or comprehend. Leave the timing and the details of exactly "how" things will manifest to these unseen forces. They are your co-creating partners!

To your success,
Susan

P.S. I was interviewed this week by Davette Harvey on Blogtalk Radio! Davette and I had great fun recording it. Please check it out at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/amenique-radio/2009/11/17/empowerment-zone !

P.P.S. Contact me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to set up your complimentary intro session or telesession with me! Check back over my last several posts for examples of possible formats...or just come with what's on your mind!

P.P.P.S. to Locals:

Santa's Secret Workshop

An easy, pleasant way to get some of your holiday shopping done!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009, at 6:30 pm

Hosted by McCormick Chiropractic in Pottstown

Admission is free, but you must register with our host at 610-705-0201.

I'll have gift items and gift certificates for coaching and Reiki available there!

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***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

***Member of the TriCounty Community Network, a non-profit human services resource at www.tcnetwork.info.***

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Prolonged Denial: A Hidden Source of Trouble

Denial...it's so easy to see in others. By definition, we have a very difficult time seeing it in ourselves.

Useful denial is like useful anger; they're both designed by nature to be temporary. Temporary anger nudges us to take constructive action. Temporary denial protects us from being hit by all the emotional pain of loss at one time.

Prolonged denial, though, becomes a nasty little gremlin that really messes with your mind and life. Because we can't see the denial itself, we must look at the symptoms. Here are a few to consider:

~Creative Blocks. Chances are, they aren't caused by laziness or lack of something to express!

~Free-Floating Anxiety is probably a misnomer in most cases. We don't see the source, so we assume there isn't one. Long-term denial may well be the culprit in certain situations.

~Free-Floating Anger is another symptom. Chronic bouts of unexplainable or inappropriate anger are like the release value on a pressure cooker.

TV personality and author Art Linkletter tells a story about a store clerk who looked like she was about to snap at anyone (maybe everyone...) who walked by. Mr. Linkletter asked her, "Are you angry?" She answered, "No, of course I'm not angry!" To this he replied, "Well, you'd better tell your face!"

~Exhaustion...physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual. It takes a lot of energy to suppress emotions, which sometimes leads to...

~Depression. And again, it may be difficult to pin down the cause if it's related to chronic denial.

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Resources for Help

~Self-Help. If the problem isn't too deeply entrenched, you might be able to gain clarity through journaling.

~Friendly Help. Ask someone you trust to give you objective feedback about what you might not be acknowledging.

~Therapy may be needed to rout out deep-seated denial and work through it.

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Then What?

~Forgiveness and/or self-forgiveness. This is easier said than done, and it takes time. A therapist can help you develop this skill set.

~Redesign Your Life. Prolonged denial and its symptoms can take you way off course in life. When you have worked through the issues, you will be ready to construct a lifestyle more to your liking. A great life coach may be just the catalyst you need!

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Shameless Plug Time: Contact me for a complimentary exploratory coaching session by phone or in person! Email: scleaver@dejazzd.com.

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~Shameless Request Time: Please comment on your experience with this topic! Questions are welcome, too.

Thanks,
Susan

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

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A Valentine's Gift for Your Creativity

Well, Intrepid Creators, February is here ... the month of hearts and flowers and turning our attention to our romantic relationship if we have one. If so, I hope this relationship supports your creativity. But what if it doesn't, or what if you're between relationships at the moment?

Regardless of your relationship status with another, when it comes to supporting your creativity, how you relate to yourself is always of utmost importance. Ask yourself these questions:

Do I have clarity around my values? Are those values reflected in how I live and what I create?

Do I feel and display a sense of authenticity? If not, why not? Is it because of a fear of criticism? Is it because your persona has hardened into a mask, making difficult for even you to recognize your true self?

Do you allow yourself some solitude each week, when you can meditate, journal, collage, or just stare out the window?

I know these are tough questions, and the needed changes that may be implied by some of your answers could take some work. Hang in there anyway, just as you would with a romantic relationship that's important to you. Your creativity will thank you in ways that will long outlast candy and flowers!

My best to you,
Susan

P.S. to those of you in Southeastern PA: Please check out this site for details about several workshops I'll be teaching in February and March for the Boyertown Arts & Activities Alliance: http://www.boyertownpa.org/News/1-23.AAA-Activities-nwMFT_37.aspx!

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

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The Amazing Dr. Maisel!

Who are the role models for your creative role models? Chances are, one of them is Eric Maisel, Ph.D. He's a creativity coach with a psychotherapist's background who has written over 30 books (fiction and nonfiction). How does he do it? I suspect it has to do with what he calls his "innate wackiness"!

I'll give you a quick look at just three of his many books on creativity. All three of these include great exercises.

The Creativity Book: A Year's Worth of Inspiration and Guidance

For me, following the weekly format of the book would be like eating only one corn chip a week. I gobbled up the whole book within a few weeks!

Here's one of my favorite quotes from the closing paragraph of the book: "I pray that you couple your creative efforts with the other elements of a life worth living: intimate relating and compassionate action in the world."

A Life in the Arts: Practical Guidance and Inspiration for Creative and Performing Artists

This workbook addresses practical considerations that you might see in other creativity books, such as combining art and business, but Maisel also covers the grittier topics that we don't like to think about. These are topics such as depression, anxiety, isolation, and rage. I can tell you from personal experience how grateful many artists will be to see these issues covered so openly!

In this book, Maisel also covers a topic that I haven't seen anywhere else, and that is, how does a person leave (or scale back on) the arts if needed or desired. The reason could be physical, as with an injured dancer, or emotional, as with a case of burn-out. Whatever the reason, Maisel spells out a plan for easing your way out and dealing with the feelings of loss that go with it.

Fearless Creating: A Step-by-Step Guide to Starting and Completing Your Work of Art

The coach in me found Maisel's explanation of appropriate and inappropriate clarity to be of particular interest.

If you've been actively creative for any length of time, you know that anxiety can't be ignored; it must be dealt with. The Appendix on "Anxiety Management Strategies" in this book provides many useful techniques for dealing with anxiety before, during, and after the creative process.

Check Out Dr. Maisel's site at http://www.ericmaisel.com/!

My best to you,
Susan

P.S. Last call for complimentary email support (once a week for four weeks) for your 2008 resolutions! Email me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to get started.

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver***

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