Bring Your Own Bliss (BYOB), Part One

(Note:  I'd like to acknowledge and thank my community members, shown at the right!)

On your travels through life, I'd like to encourage you to consider a new twist on the old acronym, "BYOB."  For this post, instead of "Bring your own bottle,"  try this one: "Bring your own bliss!"  

OK, OK...if you insist on a mixed drink, you can stir in some gratitude with the bliss!  (Sliced fruit and a paper umbrella are optional.)  

Photo (c) iStockphoto/THEPALMER

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I want to show you another way to look at the Law of Attraction (like attracts like), by using the popular "be, do, have" model.  Bliss and gratitude are major catalysts in this process, so bring them with you!

Many people get the order of "be, do, have" mixed up, and it makes them feel frustrated.  A common mix-up, especially for those with "Type A" personalities, is "Do, do, do, have, be." 

As you might guess, this model is a major cause of burn-out, and it has a  feeling of striving.  Striving will send the Law of Attraction away from alignment with these folks.  It's as if they are saying, "I have to do it all myself, and how can I take bliss along if I don't have it yet?"

Well, of course they won't feel blissful while working fifty hours a week or more!  They need to slow down, watch for help from the Universe, and dig deep in their mental pockets for their bliss. Gratitude can help them remember where they put it.

"If you don't live it, it won't come out of your horn."  ~~Charlie Parker

Photo (c) iStockphoto/Svermir

'More on this topic next time...BYOB!

With a double shot of gratitude for you,
Susan

The Great-Life Advocate (TM)

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~~Odds and Ends~~

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Denise Kappa



What I Bring to Our Coaching Relationship, Part 4

Parts 1, 2, and 3 are with my posts dated 11/17/12, 12/22/12, and 1/27/13.

Today's topic: I assist you in creating action plans that will carry you forward between our coaching sessions.

*I provide structure. 

*We brainstorm together for options.

*We put together a list of resources related to your goal.

*I assist you in developing effective strategies and results.


Who do you want to become?

If you're looking for support from someone who's not afraid to say, "I dare ya!", then let's talk!  Email me here to set up a complimentary exploratory session by phone or in person. 

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A Word to the Wise

My post, "Dr. Amen's ANT's," has been on my top-ten most popular posts list for well over a year, according to my Blogger stats!  Check it out by going to 11/17/08 in the creative4life archives.  

Dr. Daniel Amen has at least four books published, and he's been featured on special programs for PBS.  Dr. Amen is a respected expert on the relationship between the brain and behavior.

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***All of Susan's creative4life posts are (c) Susan Cleaver.***


***Member of the TriCounty Community Network, at www.tcnetwork.org.***

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The Hero's Journey, Part 3

In this post, we'll follow our hero-to-be (or heroine) as he moves through the "action" and "resolution" parts of his Quest.  To see the inner process he went through to get to this point of initiating action, please check out Part 2 of this series at my 12/22/12 post. You'll find an introduction to the topic in Part One, which is dated 11/17/12.

Step 5: Our hero steps into the unknown, along with his fears and self-doubt.  The unknown can be representing  one of many possible experiences, whether the Quest is fictional or one you may have experienced last year. Here are a few examples: dealing with illness or an injury, instead of trying to ignore it and hoping it'll go away, or maybe losing a job, and pounding the pavement every day to find a new one.

Photo (c) iStockphoto/frender

Step 6: The hero-to-be interacts with others during the Journey.  He often meets new people along the way, and they sometimes tend to be the kind of people who at first, seem like unlikely pals, or even enemies.  This is all part of the uncertainty he endures.

The friends usually play a part in helping the hero through the crises that he faces during the Quest.  As we'll see later, the hero faces the big, looming, ultimate challenge on his own.

Photo (c) iStockphoto/Stefanie Timmermann

Step 7: He's faced with a series of inner and outer obstacles along the way.  While still dealing with inner conflicts, such as fear and resistance, our hero's integrity helps him find the courage to continue confronting the outer challenges.

For example, think of a father who confronts obstacles that he never thought he could, until it comes to the welfare of his child.

"There are some things you learn best in calm,

 and some in storm." ~~Willa Cather

Step 8: The most crucial part of the mission must be faced by the hero alone.  I believe this is because Universal Wisdom wants it to be very clear that, whatever the outcome, it is the actions of the hero that have brought him to the end of his Journey.  He now feels things inside him that he did not know were there.

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Daniel Halvorson


"A change of feeling is a change of destiny."  ~~Neville Goddard

Step 9: The successful hero returns home with a new perspective of others, himself, and of life.  The hero may not have been successful at what he thought he was supposed to do.  However, a different kind of success can emerge from the parts of the Journey where he feels he didn't do well.

I have experienced this several times!  For me, it often seems that I've wasted a lot of time and effort on something, only to find later that it was preparing me for a new, exciting part of my life. Remember this when you experience and unwanted "nub" in the tapestry of your life!

"Nothing is a waste of time if you use the experience wisely."  

~~Auguste Rodin

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/creativeye99 

Thanks for reading!

Susan   
                            

The Great-Life Advocate (TM)

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Photo (c) iStockphoto/Denise Kappa

~~Odds and Ends~~

What I Bring to Our Coaching Relationship, Part 3

You can find Parts 1 and 2 at my posts dated 11/17/12 and 12/22/12.

Today's Topic: I'm a catalyst for positive changes in you, so you can become the person you need to be to reach your goals, by providing...

*Challenge
*Accountability
*Feedback

In my next post, I'll explain how we work together to create your action plans.

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My post from 6 /21 /12, called "Enlightenment, the Sequel" is currently on my top-ten list of posts, according to my Blogger stats.  Please check it out!  

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Attention, Locals....  Save the Dates!  

Boyertown Wellness Fair, Saturday, March 23, 2013; complimentary Reiki samples at my exhibit table! 

Boyertown Continuing Education Program; Wednesday nights in April, I'll be teaching "Audacious Self-Care"!

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***All of my posts are (c) Susan Cleaver.***

**Member of the TriCounty Community Network, at www.tcnetwork.org**   

Hero's Journey, Part 2: Resisting Change

In the previous post from 11/17/12, I wrote an overview of the "Hero's Journey" cycle  of growth and how it affects all of us.  Of the nine parts I listed there, I want to take a closer look at the first four parts today.

Step 1: What happens to the hero or heroine shortly before the Journey begins?  You'll probably notice the structure from books you've read, movies you've seen, and, well,...life!  The cycle begins at the status quo.  The hero-to-be is entrenched in his current comfort zone, although he doesn't know that yet.  

Step 2: As a new Quest begins to tap him on the shoulder, the potential hero's comfort zone begins to feel like a tight pair of shoes.  The comfort zone may even show signs of crumbling altogether, causing him confusion and fear.  

Step 3: He begins to resist the changes.  At this point, he has self-doubt that he could be of any help on an important Quest...he feels like his own life is falling apart.  This stage is sometimes called Divine Discontent,  but the hero-to-be sees nothing divine about it yet!

Have you experienced Divine Discontent?  I know I have.  If you're willing to share the experience with my other readers and me, please add your comments at the bottom of this post.  You may be amazed by how you can help someone else just by sharing your story!  It's very powerful. 

Photo (c) iStockphoto/DNY59

Step 4: The Call gets too loud to ignore.  Something or someone dear to the prospective hero is at risk.  His confusion and fear escalate to very uncomfortable levels.  Of course he has free will, but the Call is so compelling now, he must make a decision that's in line with his values.

Photo (c) iStockphoto/Marek Uliasz

Still shaking in his boots, the hero-to-be feels a heavy mantle of responsibility and stewardship.  He also continues to carry the self-doubt.  Quests arrive without instructions, much like babies do.  Yikes!

Photo (c) iStockphoto/lionvision

In my next post, we'll look at the possibilities for our hero-to-be's experiences as he takes his next shaky steps.

Until then, please leave your comments and questions below!

Thanks,

Susan 

P.S. What I Bring to Our Coaching Relationship, Part 2 

In my 11/17/12 post, I shared the main points with you on this topic.  Today, I want to elaborate on the first topic, I enrich your "thinking environment."  Below are four of the services I deliver in this area:

• I listen deeply with trained ears.
• Our high-energy sessions are fun!
• You feel emotionally supported through sincere validation and caring.
• I provide prospective.

In my next post, I'll discuss how I'm a catalyst for positive change.

P.P.S. My post from 2/22/12, "Stewardship, Self-Care, and...Multi-Tasking?" is one of my current top-ten posts, according to my Blogger stats.  It begins with this relaxing photo.  I hope you'll check it out. And it's never too late to comment or ask a question!

Photo (c) iStockphoto/ooyoo

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are (c) Susan Cleaver.***

***Member of the TriCounty Community Network at www.tcnetwork.org.***

The Hero's Journey: How We Grow, One Quest at a Time

Scratch the surface of most books, movies, and plays, and you'll see that the story line is some form of  The Hero's (or Heroine's) Journey.  Why does this template resonate with us, and make us feel like we "just couldn't put that book down"?

We feel this resonance because we have experienced this journey in our own lives.  These quests result in changes in our level of understanding and growth. Some of us are going through this process now.  Those of us who are willing to grow and stretch will set out on more of these journeys. 

The Quest may look to be mostly inner or outer, but we as humans have a holistic nature.  The journey will change us in both ways.  Most of us don't go somewhere like Machu Picchu (pictured below)  just "because it was there."  It may look like an outer quest, but we are changed to the core when we return.

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/The Power of Forever Photography

This is the first post of a series I have planned on this topic.  In this post, I'd like to give you an overview of the Quest structure, and then we'll explore the first few phases more closely in the next post.

If this post brings to mind one of your journeys, and you're willing to share it, please click "Comments" and tell us about it.  I believe that the more we use this blog to create community, the more we can enrich each other.  It's especially valuable in this time of economic sluggishness.

O.K., here's the overview of the Hero or Heroine's Quest, along with relevant photos:

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/PeskyMonkey

1) The hero-to-be  is at home, enjoying relative calm.
2) He hears the Call of the Quest.
3) He resists the Call because it has unknown risks, and he hesitates to leave his comfortable,  familiar environment.  He doubts that he can successfully complete the Quest. 
4) The Call gets too loud to resist.  Something or someone he cares about deeply is at risk.
5) The Hero accepts the Call, and he leaves his familiar environment to set out into the unknown.
6) He meets some unlikely but helpful friends along the way.
7) He's faced with a series of inner and outer obstacles along the way.
8) The most crucial part of the mission must be faced by the hero alone.
9) The successful hero returns home with a new perspective of himself and of life.  

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/DNY59

Thanks,

Susan

P.S.  I  would like to give you a clear look at what I deliver as a Coach.  I'll discuss these items in more detail in future posts.  For now, I'll share the main points with you.

What I Bring to Our Coaching Relationship

~I enrich your "thinking environment."~

~I'm a catalyst for positive changes in you, so you can become the person you need to be to reach your goals.~

~I assist you in creating action plans that will carry you forward between our sessions.~

If you have any questions, or you'd like a complimentary exploratory session (by phone or in person), you can reach me here.

P.P.S. My post from June 21, 2012, called Enlightenment, the Sequel, is on the list of my top 
ten most popular posts, according to my Blogger stats.  Please check it out!

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are (c) Susan Cleaver.***

***Member of  the TriCounty Network at www.tcnetwork.org.***

My People-Pleasing Past

People-Pleasing began by the tender age of six for me.  I was in first grade, where we colored a lot.  My problem with all this coloring was that it seemed to take me forever.  

But, being a resourceful kid, I soon found the perfect solution, even if I do say so myself!  I had all the kids on my worksheets wear orange.  What a great idea!  This saved me lots of time...shirts, pants, dresses, and skirts...all in orange.  For me, orange was the new black!

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Svemir

My teacher, however, did not see the perfection in my solution.  And like most children, I felt a strong need to please adults. who were, after all the source of our ability to survive!

This self-protection response is often so deeply ingrained, that we forget to leave it behind as we approach adulthood, allowing it to create havoc in our lives.

Once, as a teen, I agreed to serve at a fund-raising dinner.  It was scheduled for the day after my friend's slumber party, which I was looking forward to, even though I knew it would involve very little slumber!

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Jessica Key

I had a great time with my friends, but the next day I had to drag myself to the dinner, which I never should have agreed to in the first place.  Saying NO couldn't have been any worse than that, especially when, in this case, it wasn't a self-protective response...it was just a habit that was not serving me well at all.

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/meshaphoto

Now...fast-forward to my college years.  My roommate and I received a "friendly visit" from two other young women who lived on our floor of the dorm.  They mentioned that they were hungry, so we got out some snacks for the four of us.

  Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Kadir Barcin

O.K., now here's the rub....  The following night, the same scenario played out again.  These young women didn't bother with us any other time.  Clearly these two were just looking for anyone with food who had passed "People-Pleasing 101"!

So, my roommate and I devised a "Pest Control Plan."  When the moochers returned on the third night, they said, "We're hungry!"  My roommate and I responded, "So are we!"  The pests never returned, and we saved our study time as well as our snack supplies.

Over the years, I've learned to protect my time, welcoming countless hours back into my own life! You can share your experiences with and solutions to this issue at the "comments" area button below.  Most of us need a tune-up now and then to keep our boundaries in place, so please share what you know with the rest of the creative4life Community.

Now, when I look back at my people-pleasing past, I see for sure that there was no future in it!  :-)

Thanks,
Susan

Mind Spa Coaching & Reiki

with Susan Cleaver

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/CGinspiration


Announcing Two Community Events
in the greater Philadelphia, PA, area

Pope John Paul II Wellness Fair
"Fun exhibits, healthy activities...and door prizes!"

Saturday, October 6, 2012, from 10 am to 1pm

Pope John Paul II High School, 181 Rittenhouse Rd., Royersford, PA 19468

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Kate_2004


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2nd Annual
You Can Heal Yourself from Cancer
Event presented by McCormick Chiropractic

Saturday, October 13, 2012; registration at 8:15 am; program from 9:00 am to 1:00 pm

Location: North Coventry Fire Dept. Social Room, 114 W. Schuylkill Rd., Pottstown, PA 19465

Eight inspiring speakers are slated to speak!  

Tickets are $20 each before Oct. 2; $25 after or at the door.  Bring a friend for free.

To register, call Lisa Weir at 610-705-0201.

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***All of Susan's creative4life posts are (c) Susan Cleaver.***

***Proud member of the TriCounty Community Network (at www.tcnetwork.org), Coachville, and the Coachville R&D Team.***

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How an Enlightened Person Views the World

Welcome to Part 3 of the Enlightenment Series! (See 5/15/12 and 6/21/12 for the earlier posts.)  I'm not an expert on the topic, but I do find it fascinating!  This post will focus on what it might be like to see the "Earth Angels'" view of the world.

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Vicky Leon

Enlightened folks understand the holistic nature of our world.  They are patient, because they keep in mind, for example, that for the flowers in the photo to bloom, lots of elements and processes must be present and come together in a certain way to make these flowers.  A lot of what goes on can't be seen. 


I think we all expect this with flowers, but we forget it when we are trying to manifest dreams and goals over a long period of time, and we don't see any indication of change yet.  "Earth Angels" see everything in a holistic framework, so they trust in this natural way that our world works.

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Daniel Halvorson

  

Those enjoying enlightenment also understand that in this world, what you see is not what you get in the time/space arena.  As physical beings, we must operate with this illusion of time and space.  But when we get help from the Unseen, it does not have the restrictions of time and space.  This is why "Distance Reiki" can exist as an energy practice, to name just one example.  


If this idea seems difficult to grasp, that's because it is!  You're not alone, and you don't need to fully understand it.  You just need to be aware of  it.  Because we are both spiritual and physical beings, we've been given this interesting adventure of having a foot in each camp!


I'd love to see your thoughts on this!


Thanks,
Susan


Mind Spa Coaching and Reiki

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are (c) Susan Cleaver.***

***Member of the TriCounty Community Network at www.tcnetwork.org.***

   

Enlightenment, the Sequel

My last post, from May 15, 2012, is called "Shedding Some Light on Enlightenment."  In that post, I mentioned that, even though I'm no expert on the subject, I have lots of opinions about it!  :-)

Today's post explores a few more facets of the subject, based on my friendships with people who certainly seem to be well on their way to enlightenment.

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Andrea Haase

I love this photo of the Yin/Yang symbol.  We're all familiar with it.  Enlightened folks live it as much as they can.  They know this symbol of balance applies to everything.  Here are a few examples:

Balance of...

• an individual's male (yang) and female (yin) energies
• action (yang) and inaction (yin)
• light (yang) and darkness (yin)
• helping others (yang) and stepping back and allowing (yin) them to learn by doing
• strength (yang) and and self-restraint (yin)
• the energy in a space (Feng Shui)
• chemicals in the body
• the foods we eat 

If you would like a challenge, observe and aid in the balancing of these energies, and see if you can think of more examples for the list.  Then click on "comments" below so we can work on this as a community.  Please let us know the results of your challenge.

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Brian Jackson

An enlightened person is simply amazing when helping others.  Just imagine for a few moments that you are the person being helped, one-on-one.  The first thing you might notice is her soothing positive energy and the great effect it has on you.

She will give you 100% of her attention...that is so rare these days!  She's not in a hurry, and she knows how to listen.  As you speak with her, you'll soon realize that she sees your potential, and she's talking to you from that perspective.

This person frames suggestions in the most constructive way possible.  She's very open-minded, and you can see her love for humanity in her eyes.  She thrives rather than strives, and can help you do the same.  She is openly grateful for the opportunity to assist you.  Not only does she enjoy it, but she sees a tipping point at which positive energy can do even more good in this world.  And you, if you wish, are being recruited into the gentlest group of people you may ever know!

If there is any sort of boot camp at all, you were probably already there when you arrived, which could be why you're there in the first place!  It's that "dark night of the soul" boot camp, and you have come to the right person to assist you.  She can't get you out on her own, but she can point the way back to the light, if you're willing to take the many trusting steps that are required...not by her, but by your own psyche.....

I see my friends who are like this as Earth Angels.  Sometimes I ask them to turn around, so I can check for wings or a few stray feathers sticking out! :-) 

With gratitude,
Susan

Mind Spa Coaching and Reiki

with Susan Cleaver

P.S. Remember to fill us all in about the challenge above and about being in the company of these Earth Angels.  I know that many of you reading this are Earth Angels yourselves...be careful about those stray feathers!  :-)

P.P.S. Here's another post from the top ten most popular on creative4life.  You can find it in the archives under 2/22/12:

"Stewardship, Self-Care, and...Multi-Tasking?"

***All of Susan's posts on creative4life are (c) Susan Cleaver.***

***Member of the TriCounty Community Network at www.tcnetwork.org ***