Goal Setting for Audacious Self-Care

~Complimentary Coaching Hot Line on Thursday, February 10!~

See details at the end of this post.

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/PeskyMonkey

Greetings, readers! If you haven't read about the Audacious Self-Care Community yet, please read my post from last week! This is a year-long opportunity to get and give support around how to take the best possible care of our selves, especially during the recession.

O.K., last week I promised I'd write more about goals. In my November post (You might want to check that one out, too.), I wrote about a popular goal-setting method called SMART Goals. The idea is to use this acronym to remember these elements of a great goal. Is your goal Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time Bound?

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Marek Uliasz

I've used this SMART method for several years, and it has been very useful for me. My only problem has been with the last descriptor, Time Bound, especially when too many elements of the goal were out of my control.

If the "control factor" drops below about 75%, though, I feel that I'm making an uninformed decision. Then if I don't reach the quotas in my plan, I feel demoralized. I need to remember that I 'm stepping on the toes of my silent partner, Intuition. If the decision is that difficult for me, then I'm probably not the one to make it.

So, for goals where I have limited control or information, I use what I call STAR Goals:

S for Significant

Design a goal for your Audacious Self-Care that gets you out of your comfort zone. That may be a little scary, but that's O.K. You'll be moving forward, which is much more rewarding than spinning your wheels with a goal that requires only "busy work." Busy work comes from fear. It makes you feel productive while avoiding the real change you want to make.

T for Teamwork

Create an inter-developmental relationship with a partner or group. The interplay of your ideas will help you both stay motivated and to maintain flexible thinking. This is true whether you're working on the same goals or different ones. A little cross-pollination may be just what you need!

A for Accountability

Find at least one person who is willing to hold you accountable for completing what you've said you would do. If you're feeling a lot of internal resistance, you may need to check in with this person several times a day. Create a scoreboard for yourself if that helps.

R for Realistic

Design your goal so that it feels like a bit of a stretch (remember: no "busy work"). If you're feeling some excitement and some fear at the same time, that's a good sign that your goal is realistic. When you're planning, take into consideration your current responsibilities and leave room for the unexpected. Feeling overwhelmed is not only stressful but actually detrimental. Pushing through overwhelm is not a "badge of honor." Remember, this is Audacious Self-Care! Respect your limits and don't let your STAR burn out.

photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Diana Walters


I was inspired to develop STAR Goals after I heard Master Coach Dave Buck say that for the big plans he's working on now, he doesn't know when they will be complete. He's just going to keep at it until he gets the numbers he wants, even if it takes a few years!

If your goal doesn't inspire you to keep going without a specific end date, maybe you need to find a goal that you're more passionate about.

Comments and Questions, Please!

As you create your Audacious Self-Care Goals for "The Possible You," please let us know how the experience went for you. What goal-setting method did you use? What questions do you have? What advice do you have for us from your experience? What emotions do you feel when you think about your goals?

Remember, being a member of the Audacious Self-Care Community has no strings. You don't have to share your email address with me. There will be many complimentary activities to participate in. You don't have to participate in the reasonably-priced activities unless you are comfortable doing so.

I believe that being in the community will ease the sting of the recession for those who participate. I can't abide with the idea that when people need help the most is also when they can least afford it. Let's work together to pull ourselves out of that cycle!

Thank you,

Susan

P.S. I'm hosting a complimentary Coaching Hot Line on Thursday, February 10, 2011, from Noon to 8:00 pm Eastern! Just call at the top of one of these hours for a session of approximately 30 minutes. (First to call, first to be served at the top of each hour.)

Your only responsibility is to pay any long-distance charges from you phone provider. No prior registration is required. Just pick the top of the hour that works for you and call the Hot Line Number, 610-385-3766. This type of exploratory session is a $35 value!

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P.P.S. This Saturday, February 5, 2011, from 3:00 to 6:00 pm Eastern, join us for a peaceful journey around the labyrinth while listening to soothing live music! This opportunity is available in Pottstown, PA, for a small donation. Complimentary Reiki will also be available! Call me for more information at 610-385-3766 or email me at scleaver@dejazzd.com. This is a great chance to practice Audacious Self-Care!

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***All of Susan's posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

***Proud, active member of the TriCounty Community Network at http://www.tcnetwork.org/.***

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2011: The Year of Audacious Self-Care!

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Ann Marie Kurtz

Welcome!

I'm hosting a year-long program of Audacious Self-Care to build a community that will soften the blow of the recession somewhat for all of us. It really bothers me that now, when folks are looking for ways to rise above the recession and have to great lives anyway, many of them can't afford assistance with their goals!

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I don't want us living "lives of quiet desperation," as Henry David Thoreau put it. I like this quote by Thoreau much better:

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined."

I know we can all do this despite the recession! Even if you've suffered losses because of the recession, I believe in your power to overcome them and "Live the life you have imagined."

I developed the Audacious Self-Care program so that you can participate in many no-cost and/or reasonably-priced activities. It's this simple: if you want in, you're in! The program itself has no enrollment fee, and you are not obligated to participate in any part of it that has a fee if you're not comfortable with that.

I discussed the Audacious Self-Care program in my 11/22/10 post, along with some goal-setting tips. I encourage you to take a look at that post, too. And later this month, I'll be posting more about goal setting and how to pick the best goal-setting system for you.

Audacious Self-Care is a theme that I'm very passionate about, and I believe it's the perfect one to focus on during the recession! We'll be covering four topics, one for each quarter of the year, keeping in mind that self-care is world-care, and world-care is self-care!

1) The Possible You

2) Take a Look Around: Your Immediate Environment

3) Boundaries and Bridges: Your Interactions with Others

4) Audacious Contribution and Stewardship

Please note: I am not harvesting emails through this program, and there is no official sign-up. Just jump in wherever and whenever you want!

I would love to hear from you in the comments section of this blog! I know we can help each other by reporting our success stories, asking questions, giving advice, and making observations right here on the blog.

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The Audacious Self-Care Community needs your input! I know it will be worth your time to support and be supported and inspired by this community.

I'd like to call upon my five blog followers to step up and get the conversation started. Many thanks to spiritcoach, denagrad, decory, Hazel Dugz, and pf_black44!

For blog followers and non-followers alike, please share your thoughts with us about our current topic, The Possible You. Here's some food for thought: Close your eyes and imagine the best possible you. Describe the scene, including sounds, sights, who is with you, what you're doing, and how you're feeling.

At what level of belief are you that you are actually heading there? 50%? 85%? (If it's zero, don't worry. We'll help you bump it up!) What evidence is currently in your life or in your personal history to support your belief? And finally, what will your self-care need to look like in order to support the possible you?

Most of us have a desire to make the world a kinder and gentler place, and that starts with being kinder and gentler to ourselves! As Daniel Pink, the author of Drive, says:

"...the secret to high performance and satisfaction in today's world is the deeply human need to direct our own lives, to learn and create new things, and to do better by ourselves and our world."

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If you would like a more personal venue, I also encourage occasional brief email exchanges (scleaver@dejazzd.com) at no cost and with no strings. You can even send snail-mail if you wish! :-) The address is Susan Cleaver, P.O. Box 586, Douglassville, PA 19518-1121.

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Speaking of snail-mail, I publish a quarterly, two-page newsletter that is complimentary. (If you live outside of the domestic US, I may ask you to help with the postage, though!) Just let me know if you'd like to receive it and where you'd like it to be sent.

The Audacious Self-Care Community is going to be a great inter-developmental source of fun and support, even if I do say so myself. ('See? I'm already a bit audacious!)

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All my best,

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Susan

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P.S. to local folks: I'll be teaching an accelerated, reasonably-priced version of Audacious Self-Care for the Boyertown Area School District's Continuing Education Program. We'll meet for one hour on each of the four topics.

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We'll cover one each week for four Mondays, starting on March 14. Contact me (scleaver@dejazzd.com) or the District for details.

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***One more thing: Please spread the word about The Audacious Self-Care Community! The more people we have involved, the more wisdom we'll have to share and the more folks we can help. Thank you!***

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***All of Susan's posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

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***Proud, active member of the TriCounty Community Network, http://www.tcnetwork.org/.***

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Please Join Us for the Resolution Revolution!

Photo (c) iStockphoto.com/Marek Uliasz

A Call to Action: Prepare Now for Your 2011 Goals...

And Help Others Do the Same

"Isolation is the dream killer," says career coach Barbara Sher. So I propose we work together on our resolutions for the New Year! You don't have to sign up for anything, and you needn't spend any money for it. It's just this simple: if you want to join us, you're in!

Just watch this blog and/or my snail-mail newsletter from now until the end of 2011. My other readers and I would love to assist you with your problems and questions, and to cheer for your victories!

You can join in the conversation by commenting on the blog, calling me (610-385-3766), or by email at scleaver@dejazzd.com. I'm not harvesting contact information here...you can even send in your comments or questions by snail mail with no return address if you wish! (Susan Cleaver, P.O. Box 586, Douglassville, PA 19518-0586).

This is a stand-alone, complimentary program that does not require attendance at any fee-based programs that I may offer on the topic.

Many of you are familiar with SMART goals, I'm sure, and if we add a few more elements to this system, it becomes even more effective. I call it WAPP:

~Work with a group for encouragement, accountability, and fun!

~Always state your goals in terms of what you do want, not what you don't want.

~Prepare your goals ahead of time so you can work out any wrinkles in your plan.

~Put your goals in writing.

Now let's take a look at the SMART goal process:

My goal: 2011 will be a year of Audacious Self-Care for 200 or more people who will take successful action related to what I'll be writing and speaking about throughout the year. These people will notify me about their successful action so I can keep track of how close I am to my goal.

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What's your Audacious Self-Care Goal?

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How is my goal SPECIFIC?

~I will share my Audacious Self-Care Message at five or more events that I will lead or participate in .

~I'll write 25 or more posts on this blog that will help others with their Audacious Self-Care.

~I'll write 12 or more articles in my newletters this year on the topic of Audacious Self-Care.

~I intend to have a record of 200 or more anecdotes from readers, clients, and participants that explain the Audacious Self-Care actions they took and how they helped.

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How is your goal SPECIFIC?

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How is my goal MEASURABLE?

~The articles and posts mentioned above will each be 50 words or longer.

~The minimums mentioned for the posts, articles, and anecdotes in the section above will provide clear ways to measure my progress as well as the achievement of my goal.

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How is your goal MEASURABLE?

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How is my goal ATTAINABLE?

~My goal is doable with a bit of a stretch. A little stretching is good!

~Putting numbers to most of the sub-goals was not to difficult, because I had past performance to guide me.

~The tricky one was the one where I'm intending 200 or more reports back from folks. I have not made a request like this before, and the goal requires actions that are out of my direct control. Like Scarlotte O'Hara said, "I'm counting on the kindness of strangers [and friends.]"

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How is your goal ATTAINABLE?

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How is my goal RELEVANT?

~This goal supports the personal growth and happiness of the those I'll be able to reach with it (including me).

~This goal supports my values, and I'm excited about getting started. Now that's AUDACIOUS!

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How is your goal RELEVANT?

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How is my goal TIME-BOUND?

~The actions and results will take place during the Year 2011.

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How is your goal TIME-BOUND?

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"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom."

~~Victor Frankl

Let's help each other choose the powerful responses to our resolutions in 2011!

Thank you,

Susan

***Gift certificates are available for Coaching and/or Reiki. Contact me at scleaver@dejazzd.com or call 610-385-3766.***

***All of Susan's posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

***Active member of the TriCounty Community Network, where we're "partnering to improve health, social and environmental conditions" in our area. www.TCNetwork.org ***

A Public Service Announcement and My Two Cents

Photo (c)iStockphoto/Rebecca Grabill

Early Childhood Parenting Made Fun! (R)

A six-week parent training program designed by the Love and Logic (R) Institute, Inc.

Designed for parents of children who are between the ages of 0 & 6.

Would you like to feel more confident as a parent?

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Would you like to have more fun parenting?

Would you like to feel more relaxed at the end of the day?

This program will take place from 10:00 to 11:30 am on the following Wednesdays:

October 13, 20, 27 and November 3, 10, 17

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The classes and childcare are free!

Location: Grace Lutheran Church, 660 N. Charlotte St, Pottstown, PA

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Register by Friday, October 8, by calling Whitney Leone at

Family Services, 610-326-1610 (x233)

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If you don't live in this area, watch for the program in your area if you're in the USA! This is "America's Most Practical and Entertaining Parent Training."

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Now for My Two Cents About Our Relationships with Young Children....

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In last week's post, I wrote about interdevelopmental relationships between adult friends. Today I want to discuss the interdevelopmental relationship between an adult and a young child.

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We put a lot of energy into helping children develop into happy, healthy adults. But sometimes we forget how they tune up our development as adults. Here's a brief list of ways they do that:

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~Young children give us an excuse to play. During our busy days, play gets shoved to the bottom of the list. But play is extremely important for adults, too.

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~They are quick to forgive; what great role models they are!

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~Young children are spontaneous, a way of being that also gets the short straw in many adults' lives.

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~They speak their minds! Add a dash of tact, and you have a great recipe for stress reduction in adults.

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~Young children reawaken in us the creativity that was schooled out of us. What a blessing!

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Spontaneously yours,

Susan

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**Contact me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to set up a discounted exploratory coaching session on parenting or just about any other topic! Sessions can be done by phone or in person. No strings attached.**

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**The "My Two Cents" portion of this post is the copyright of Susan Cleaver.**

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**Active member of the TriCounty Community Network, where we're

"partnering to improve health, social and environmental conditions" in our area. www.tcnetwork.org**

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The Power of Interdevelopmental Relationships

Photo (c)iStockphoto.com/VickyLeon

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I'm excited to share this post with you because:

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~It's a great chance to introduce you to another Featured Artist, Tina Marie, and her work.

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~Along with the email below, it's an outstanding chance to share with you the power and joy of interdevelopmental relationships.

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~I'm showing off this unsolicited testimonial from Tina Marie and our valued friendship! :-)

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We've been coaching each other since the 1970's, even though we didn't call it that. We just clicked so well that we instinctively provided each other with nurturing and wisdom that we didn't even know we were capable of!

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My Recent and Treasured Email from Tina Marie

Coach,

You'll be proud of me, I hope.

I published my first co-authored book, and the proof is on its way to me. I already have enough advance orders to make a 200% profit on my investment! https://www.createspace.com/3486640

I created a website for my new business. It is just in draft format now, though it is out there: http://mysite.verizon.net/res113jik/. I found two distributors for my music and just need to add PayPal links before promoting the site!

I am working with my Godson, Eric, to create music also, and play music for events. Here's the draft of our website: http://mysite.verizon.net/res113jik/spiritualalchemy/.

The Wonderment Journey continues, and the Best is Yet to Come...

I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

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So, can you see how our relationship is interdevelopmental? There is no way that I could have made this happen for Tina Marie, no matter how powerful my coaching may be.

I dropped seeds of inspiration in some very fertile soil here. I shared my intuitions with her. I mirrored to her how she looks from my eyes. I encouraged her. And she has done the same for me on many occasions.

Tina Marie knew that she had to tackle these projects in her own way and time, just as we all do. And she's in the Divine Flow of things, as you can see! That's because she doesn't strive, resist, or try to '"push" the river. She waits for the intuitive clicks to whisper to her about the right actions at the right times...for the right reasons!

When you check out her sites, you'll see that Tina Marie is skilled in many areas, and that she creates the quiet and stillness she needs in order to hear the "still, small voice" of her intuition.

She has always been an amazing woman, and this past year in particular, she has gone well beyond amazing...and in ways that many, many people and animals on this planet will benefit from. And I am definitely one of those fortunate people!

Maybe you have some amazing friends like Tina Marie. If so, please leave a comment and let us know about them!

If you are looking for amazing friends who are suited just for you, here are the "secret sauce" ingredients:

~List the qualities you'd like to have in those friends. (Caution: Qualities only; don't focus in on particular individuals.)

~Develop these qualities in yourself.

~Go to where people with these qualities hang out and interact with them. The rest will take care of itself. You'll love it!

All my best,

Susan

P.S. 'Want some support carrying out these ideas? Contact me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to set up a discounted Exploratory Coaching Session with me by phone or in person!

P.P.S. Many thanks to my blog followers, SPIRITCOACH & DENAGRAD! I appreciate your interest!

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And one more thing...I'm an active member of the TriCounty Community Network, where we are...."Partnering to improve health, social and environmental conditions" in our area. Check us out at http://www.tcnetwork.org/!

For someone with my interests and passions, TCN is a great environment in which to make a difference AND to enjoy the company of great friends who are up to amazing things!

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***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

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Connection: The Passion of Artist Jean Richard Esther

Above is a photo that was taken while I was interviewing Jean Richard Esther, my Featured Artist for this blog post. I first met Jean at a local Farmers Market. Yes, you read that right...a Farmers Market, of all places! (www.boyertownpa.org/farmersmarket)
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The market hosted several children's activities, and Jean was there on behalf of Building a Better Boyertown (http://www.boyertownpa.org/). Jean was drawing amazing caricatures of the children.
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His three business partners (http://www.artcorner.net/) were also there, taking photos and helping children with craft projects inside a custom-remodeled school bus called the ART Mobile! (http://www.studiobbb.org/). The ART mobile is also a project of Building a Better Boyertown (http://www.boyertownpa.org/) and their artists' venue, Studio B (http://www.studiobbb.org/).
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Jean is a gifted teacher of art classes for kids and adults at Studio B and on board the ART Mobile. He also does commissioned portraits, and he explores almost every kind of art you can imagine!
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Meanwhile, Back at the Farmers Market....
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I took my grandson aboard the ART Mobile to make crafts, and then to Jean, who was sitting just outside the bus. Jean and I chatted while he drew my grandson's caricature...and for a long time after he was done. We soon learned that we have a lot of common interests and the same enthusiasm for art and for life! So, that's how Jean came to be my Featured Artist for this post.

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Connection and the "Wireless Web"

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The common thread that ran through Jean's answers to my questions can be summed up in one word: connection. Connection to others through art is Jean's passion. He loves to see his students' eyes light up when he helps them see the world in a whole new way...a way that enables them to translate it into art.

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During the interview, I asked Jean about the spiritual aspect of his work that I was sensing. Again, the word connection came up...connection with his students and connection with his Higher Self or the Universal Mind. Jean calls this the "Wireless Web." What a great term for it!

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Connection and Contribution

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Also on a spiritual note, Jean uses art and his talent as vehicles for making his contributions to the world. Again, it was about connection...connection with others through art, and the connection of his students to themselves and their passions. The world needs more passionate people!
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Don't forget to check out the sites I mentioned above. Interviewing Jean Esther was an absolute joy!

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All my best,

Susan

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P.S. Contact me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to schedule an initial coaching session by phone or in person at a reduced price. Your initial Reiki session is also at a reduced price!

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***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

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***Active Member of the TriCounty Community Network at http://www.tcnetwork.org/.

"Partnering to improve health, social and environmental conditions." ***

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What's Your Commitment Level When Working with a Helping Professional?

There are lots of us out there...Helping Professionals such as coaches, tutors, counselors, therapists, consultants, and mentors, just to name a few. Assuming the professional knows her stuff, is ethical, and is capable of building a rapport with you, how can you predict the results of working with her?

The Rest Depends on You

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

1) Am I a life-long learner?

2) Am I willing to reach more than half way (and out of my comfort zone) to co-create the change that the professional and I are working toward?

3) Will I be tempted to quit at the first unrelated but unexpected impingement on my time or money, such as a costly car repair?

4) Worse yet, will I use this impingement as a ready excuse to quit?

5) Will I respect the boundaries and time of the professional while still asking clearly for the assistance I need ?

6) Am I willing to accept help, constructive observations, and, last but not least, hearing about what I do well without reflexively deflecting the compliment?

The Bottom Line

A Helping Professional can commit with you but not for you. What priority are you putting on the change you want to make?

All my best,

Susan

P.S. Is it time for you to get moving toward what you want? Contact me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to set up a discounted intro coaching session by phone or in person!

***All of Susan's creative4life posts are copyright of Susan Cleaver.***

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***Active member of the TriCounty Commumity Network. "Partnering to improve health, social and environmental conditions." See http://www.tcnetwork.info/. ***

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