"Rely on yourself,
and be true to who you are.
What's unique about you
is what will take you far."
--from the children's book, Unstoppable Me!, by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, with Kristina Tracy
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I agree. Please stop trying to fit in! We need your unique perspective and thought processes. Yes, even if your perspective has been pathologized as ADD, dyslexia or some other label.
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Our educational system and work culture are designed to fit the majority. Just because these institutions have not fully learned how to bring out our best doesn't mean there's something wrong with us! So if the mainstream "operating system" doesn't help you to be your best, create your own.
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This requires the courage and self-confidence to dance to your own drummer. Divergent perception and thinking styles often show up in the most creative among us. Therefore, we don't want to root them out and eliminate them. Rather, we need to learn to mitigate the downsides and leverage the upsides of these styles.
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This process may sometimes include the help of an M.D., therapist, family member, employer, friend, and/or coach. To set up a free trial coaching tele-session, contact me at scleaver@dejazzd.com.
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Here I'll be specifically discussing the traits associated with high sensitivity and ADD as examples, because they're the ones I've had personal experience with and have studied the most about. For an expert's view, check out the resources I'm including for each.
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High Sensitivity: Brilliance or Burn-Out?
See the work of expert Elaine Aron, author of The Highly Sensitive Person. She explains the trait (which is present in 15 to 20% of humans and animals) and offers great tips for living well with it.
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Fortunately, this trait has not been officially pathologized, although those of us who grew up with it may have been labeled by peers as "worry warts," "scaredy-cats," "namby-pambies," "cream puffs," or "shy loners."
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Highly sensitive people (HSP's) feel things very deeply, take in more details, and tend to be highly intuitive. The upside is that these characteristics put us easily in touch with our creativity.
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To others, however, we look like we are processing more slowly than they are, but actually we are processing more deeply. This also makes us look even more hesitant and easily alarmed than we really are. You might say that non-HSP's are skiing along the surface of the water while HSP's are scuba diving.
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The deep processing of HSP's leaves us vulnerable to sensory overload. It's essential for HSP's to set ample boundaries, to take extremely good care of ourselves, and to speak up for our needs. For me, this includes rarely watching TV or reading newspapers. I have to be careful about the amount of stimulation coming through, or I end up with burn-out.
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ADD It Up: Pathology or Purpose?
For excellent coverage of ADD, see the work of Edward Hallowell, co-author of Driven to Distraction.
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For better or worse, ADD has been officially pathologized, but not all experts agree on this.
Maybe folks with ADD seem to be "all over the place" because that's where the creative ideas are! There's a time and place for linear thinking, but when you're trying to be creative, it's more likely to just get in the way.
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I like to think of the ADD mind as a kaleidoscope, reaching out in all directions to form new patterns. The lateral thinking that comes so easily to those with ADD has been written about extensively by Edward De Bono for anyone to apply. However, I have seen resistance to his methods from highly linear thinkers. This doesn't make him or them wrong; it just points again to the natural differences in thinking and perceptual styles that add to the richness of mankind's accomplishments.
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If you have ADD, take a look at what kinds of structure, support, and accountability work best for you and implement those into your daily life. I find the structure of doing these weekly posts helpful for me. And in preparing the material for the posts, it helps me to use large index cards so that I can freely change the order of my points or add to them.
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It's also helpful to team up with an accountability buddy. This works great for me. If you're interested in mutual support by phone as we each tackle our projects, email me at scleaver@dejazzd.com to set up a time.
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High Sensitivity and ADD: Kissing Cousins?
The more I learn about these two perceptual styles, the more overlap I see. As research continues in these areas, I would not be surprised to hear that they are closely linked.
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In any event, I believe that perceptual styles that deviate from the norm and the extra effort it takes to function in our culture with them result in a lot of "late bloomers." However, those of us who learn to compensate without attempting to conform are richly rewarded!
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Happy blooming,
Susan
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